Wednesday (1/17) was a long day in St Louis. I picked my husband up at his work at 5 am and we headed to St Louis. Despite the winter weather we’ve had recently, the roads were clear. We arrived at Siteman South County at 8:15 am. After registering I heard someone greet me by name and saw another 4-H House alum in the waiting area. She is a breast cancer survivor herself, but was there supporting her mom who was receiving her first chemo infusion for breast cancer. I have added that family to my prayer journal and I hope you can send good thoughts their way, as well.
My port was accessed and blood was drawn for labs. I had a great visit with my oncologist and delivered holiday presents for her and her staff. They take great care of me and each one reminds me they are praying for me each time we interact. I am doing well enough neck-down to move my scans out to every 5 months instead of every 4 months. This means my next neck-down scans will be in March.
Treatment #77 was completed without any complications
I started a new book, “The Book of Lost Names” by Kristin Harmel. I highly recommend it. I hated to stop reading when my infusions were finished.
My husband and I had time to grab lunch at Blues City Deli, one of our favorite places in St Louis. Then we drove to the main campus for my brain MRI. We had a 90-minute wait for my appointment with my neurologist.
Don’t be fooled by the smiles – we were both terribly anxious at this point, waiting for the results. I treated myself to a cupcake to get the taste of contrast out of my mouth.
2023 was a difficult year for my family and 2024 hasn’t been any better with my mom in the hospital and the rest of us so sick with respiratory illnesses. I thought it was surely time for our luck to turn. Unfortunately it did not. My case will be presented to the tumor board next week so they can decide as a group how to proceed. This is the third brain MRI that has gone before the tumor board and the fifth time overall that my chart has been presented.
I received the devastating diagnosis of Stage IV Metastatic Breast Cancer exactly four and half years ago today. I spent 90 minutes yesterday in a new-to-me online support group for MBC. We shared how we all feel like our old selves died the day of diagnosis and we miss our old lives. We talked about toxic positivity and how much it hurts when it comes from people we love. We spent a lot of the time talking about how we each feel like so many people still depend on us for help and not many people are there to offer support. I asked for advice on setting boundaries and got some good ideas.
My daughter helped me shop for groceries today including driving me so I could rest. She took care of my dogs yesterday when I was gone. We also went to visit my mom, who is home from the hospital. My mom has the absolute best home health aide, who has stepped up her hours so that I can get some rest after treatment. My mom loves her to pieces, and I do, too!
As I write this, I have 2 snoring labradors with me in bed. I’m at home on the farm I love so much. I may not know what will come of the tumor board meeting next week, but with God’s help (along with some from Dave, Haley and Amy), I will get through this particular challenge.
Edited to add that this was actually treatment #77. Sometimes I’m too tired to keep it all straight.
I am not in control. 