Gray

My paternal grandmother became a widow unexpectedly early in life. In her grief she painted every wall in her house gray. I remember her talking about that years later as advice to not make big decisions when all you see is gray in your world.

Tomorrow we will leave around 6 am to make the drive to St Louis. I have 6 appointments scheduled for the day, including neck-down scans to see if the cancer is still controlled and ending with treatment 114. We will likely return home around 11 pm. I don’t want to go but I know I must. Dave and I will make the best of the day. We always do.

This evening I spent time making art in my Llama Lounge. I just realized I only used grays in everything. Yet, today, I was able to see all 3 of my adult kids plus have tea with one of my cousins. Madi and I took a walk on a windy country road and I waited patiently while she checked out every culvert. Tomorrow will pass. I will handle whatever the scans tell us.