Mindfulness

Today is one day after treatment. I had a metastatic cancer support group zoom mid-morning and then spent some time in my Llama Lounge – reading, reflecting and writing. Several loved ones checked in to see how I am, via face time, video chat and text. It is so good to feel loved. Dave made me one of my favorites – black bean burgers. He is an amazing cook and makes food that is appetizing and healthy for me. The false spring continues so Madi and I took a walk today. On our walks I don’t wear any listening devices. I just want to be present in the moment with Madi and notice everything around us. She is a great teacher in this. She loves to go shoulder-deep in culverts. Sometimes she pauses her movement to just sniff the air. She frequently looks back to check in on me. Today is windy so I enjoyed watching her ears flap in the breeze. Being present in the moment is so refreshing and healing. It stops the racing mind of anxiety and a list of shoulds. It grounds me to all that IS instead of worrying about what WAS and what WILL BE.

When we reach our long gravel lane, I turn her loose to run home. Today she saw Dave on a tractor in the yard so there was extra speed in her strides.

When my slower steps reach home, she knows I will refresh the bucket of water at the hydrant. She prefers this to the filtered water inside the house!

Today is Ash Wednesday. I am re-reading “Wild Hope” by Gayle Boss that my pastor recommended. During Advent I enjoyed “All Creation Waits,” another book by the same author. I highly recommend both. I try to build inner strength through the practice of mindfulness. I think of mindfulness as radical acceptance – being aware of what IS and being open to that instead of letting my mind race to what SHOULD or COULD be. Madi has no idea she is my mindfulness guru.